Some poverty food

You have been having a difficult and expensive time these last few days, technology is not your friend.  So why not cook yourself something cheap and comforting and low tech.
Lentils are a wonderful source of protein, and if you eat them with something starchy such as rice or bread you get what I think is called a perfect food.  It means it has all the amino acids you need to sustain life, something which you only usually get from meat.  There are lots of different sorts of lentils.  Red lentils are good because they cook quickly and they taste nice.   Plus a 500g bag costs around 88p from Tesco and will make you 3-4 meals.
Puy lentils are the upmarket ones, but even splashing out on a box of those would cost less than 2 quid.  Anyway you don't need Puy lentils for this.  This is hippy food.  You could use white rice but 'lentils and brown rice' is such a nice lefty student cliche :)

Lentils and brown rice.
Ingredients
Red lentils
Water
Brown rice
More water
Sunflower or corn oil
Indian style spices eg ginger, turmeric, cumin, coriander, chili etc or a jar of curry paste or powder
Onions
Red, yellow or green pepper (optional)
Garlic if you like it

Depending on how much you enjoy eating lentils, the quantities are guided by  your appetite. If I cook this for myself I would use around a quarter to a third of a 500g bag of lentils.

Put lentils in a pan and run cold water over them, swirling it around.  Lots of dusty stuff should come off.  This is what will give you wind if you eat too much of it, so give a good rinse until the water gets clearer.  When you are happy, or bored, cover the lentils in water so there's about an inch of water over them and put the pan on your cooker to boil.
Follow the instructions on the brown rice packet to cook it.  B rown rice takes about 45 minutes to go soft, as opposed to white rice which takes about 15 minutes.

Let the lentils boil for around 10 minutes then turn down so they just bubble gently.  In about 20 minutes they will become a soft orange mush.  Taste them to check the texture, they should be soft all the way through.  If not, cook a few minutes longer. If they are ready drain them.

While the lentils cook, slice your onions thinly, sprinkle with salt and fry them in a little oil along with the peppers if you are using them.  Cook them gently and they will soften and the onions will go a nice golden brown. Add well chopped garlic if you like it but make sure it doesn't burn.  When the onions are cooked sprinkle them with a good shake of each of your curry spices.  Fry gently for a minute or so, taste, if it needs a bit more spice, add a bit more.  When the onions are all nicely coated in spice pour your lentils on the top, and mix them into the onions and peppers (if used).

When your brown rice is cooked drain it, serve it on the plate and add a big, big dollop of lentils.   Mmmmm.  Impress your veggie friends.  Just don't make the mistake of thinking mango chutney would go well with this.  In my opinion it doesn't (but I always forget and add it anyway).

Back again

Hope you haven't starved while I've been away but I know you have eaten at least one omelette and a jacket potato plus some freebies in the meantime.  You are not quite as helpless as I thought so I will tell you how to make something cheap and easy which you can share.
You will need to borrow a casserole dish.  This is a dish the size of a big pan made of ceramic or metal or pyrex.  You will notice it does not have plastic handles so it is safe to put it in the oven.

This is a good recipe for if you are hungry but want to eat meat.  Maybe you have an essay to write which will take you about 4 hours and you want to come home to a cooked dinner on a cold night? There will be enough for you to share with a friend or 2 or you can save it till next day in the fridge.
OK here's the recipe:
Slow cooked turkey leg
Buy a turkey leg.  They are huge and dirt cheap.  I bought one for £1.47 in Asda and it fed me, dad, Max and Vik.
You will also need:
An onion
A few potatoes
A carrot or 2
Oregano
Garlic powder
A chicken oxo cube

Switch your oven to 150 C.
Slice your onion into thin slices and cover the base of the casserole dish.
Slice the carrot(s) and spread them over the onion.  You may want to sprinkle salt and pepper on this.
Put the turkey leg on the top.
Chop the potato in slices about 1cm by 2cm by 2cm ish and fit them into the spaces around the meat.  Depending on the size of the casserole dish you may be able to fit between 1-4 potatoes.
Sprinkle salt and pepper to taste plus a good shake of oregano.
Crumble the oxo cube in a jug or mug or other receptacle and add enough water so that there will be about an inch of water in the casserole dish. You may need to add a second oxo.  A dash of worcester sauce and some garlic powder would be nice too. Mix it together then pour it on the meat and vegetables.  Put a lid on.  If you don't have a lid put tinfoil tightly over the top so the moisture can't escape.  It may be a good idea to use two bits of foil to be certain you have a good seal.
Put it in the oven.  Forget about it for 3-5 hours.  If you haven't put a lid on it will burn and the fire alarms will remind you.  If you have a lid you will come back to meltingly soft cooked turkey and veg.
Pull the meat off the bone.  It should fall off in lumps.  There will be lots of white stick like things.  These are tendons.  Remove them, you can't eat them. Chuck the bone and tendons away and you will be left with lots of soft and delicious meat and potatoes.  Put it on a plate. Eat.
Love
Mum xxx

I was going to write something but as you now have a basket of goodies from Marks and Spencer I thought I would take an evening off.  I will delegate advice giving and suggestions to The Guardian.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2010/sep/20/student-cooking


Don't expect me to be buying you a cast iron frying pan and a food processor just yet :)

xxx

Sunday dinner

As it is Sunday and your dear girlfriend is coming I thought I would tell you how to cook a form of spag bog with the ingredients you have.  You will need an onion as well, but that shouldn't be too difficult or expensive to obtain.  The quantity below will feed about 3-4 people, five if I am serving and you do lots of pasta :)

You will need:
Tin of minced beef
Jar of pasta sauce
An onion, small to medium size
Olive oil (see below if you don't have any)
Oregano (it's in a glass jar, smells like pizza, says 'oregano' on it)
Worcester sauce
Oxo cube
Pasta
Cheese

Method
Borrow a bigger frying pan than the one you have.
Borrow a bigger saucepan and boil water in a big pan and when it's boiling add salt.

While you are waiting for this, heat the oil in the frying pan.  If you have no olive oil use another oil e.g. sunflower, corn etc., butter or, if you have nothing else, margarine.  If you aren't using oil be very careful it doesn't burn.

Meanwhile, is the water boiling yet ?  If it is, add enough pasta for you and your guests (see my previous blog to know how much to use).

While tbe oil is heating cut the onion small.   When it's nice and hot put the onion in the pan and sprinkle generously with oregano and some salt.  Fry the onion until its gone soft and maybe a bit brown.  Don't burn it.

Open the tin of beef and pour it on the onion.  Then open the jar of sauce and mix that in.  Now you see why you need a bigger pan.   You might like to add a splash or two of Worcestershire sauce and maybe a crumbled oxo cube.

Cook until the pasta is ready.  The sauce is more or less cooked already, the flavour develops as you carry on cooking. 

Once the pasta is ready serve it up.  Grate some cheese on it.  If you don't have lots of friends to feed save some in the fridge and eat it tomorrow.

Bon appetit!!

xxx

Pan fail

Oh dear, you forgot to bring your pans.  But you do have half a loaf of home made bread  and some cheese.  I suggest cheese on toast.  You surely know how to make this?

I won't insult you with a recipe.

Love
Mum
xxx

You're going tomorrow

Well Sasha, it doesn't seem that long that I was looking at primary schools for you (actually it seems a very long time ago, back in the dark ages when I only had one child).....let me start again. 
Well Sasha, it doesn't seem that long since I was worrying that you hadn't got into the local must-go-to comprehensive and that your academic achievements would be limited by going somewhere with, let us say, a rather dodgy reputation.  You promised me that you would do well and you have, and tomorrow you set of to Queen Mary for Freshers Week.  You are worried about money.  I am worried that you don't know how to cook or what to eat, so I am going to give you hints, recipes and advice and maybe even some groceries to help you too.

You have a saucepan and a frying pan.  I hope the halls have a grill and/or oven as well.  I know you don't have scales for measuring so I am going to tell you how to estimate the quantities of food you will need.  Let's start very simply.

Pasta with cheese.
1. Fill an electric kettle with enough water to fill your pan to about a couple of inches below the top and switch it on.
2. Switch on the electric ring to high.
3. When the water boils put it in the pan and put the pan on the ring so it boils with big bubbles
4.Measure your pasta.  On the side of the packet it will say something like '1 serving = 100 grams' (it might be 75g or 125g, whatever).  So, if a serving is 100g and you have a 500g bag of pasta, pour about a fifth of the packet into the boiling water.  Extrapolate this advice if you are cooking for more than one person or are very hungry.
.....Carefully so you don't splash yourself with boiling water.
If you do, run the burn under a cold tap till you get bored.
5. Get a small onion and chop it up small using your sharp knife.  Don't attempt this with a blunt knife, it will be very difficult and make a mess.
6. Put a bit of oil or butter in your saucepan and put it on the other ring of the cooker on medium.  When the butter melts or the oil looks a bit less viscous add the onions,  Shake a little salt on them.  Watch carefully and move them around so they don't burn.
7. Watch the pasta.  The packet will tell you how long it takes to cook.  When the time is up try a bit.  If it's still hard and gritty boil it a bit longer.  If it is soft and squidgy take it off the heat, pour off the water without getting all the pasta in the sink and put a blob of butter on it.  Borrow a colander if you can, otherwise put a plate on top, hold it with a towel or teacloth to protect your hand from the steam and pour the water away.
8. Cook the onions until they are soft and brownish.  Take them off the heat and put them in with the pasta.  Mix it around with your plastic spatula. 
9. Tip the whole thing onto a dinner plate.
10. Grate cheese on the top.  If it doesn't melt put it in the microwave for about 20-30 seconds until it does.
11. Eat.  The pasta gives you energy, the cheese is protein and will make you feel full.  The onions will repeat on you so you think you have eaten a proper meal.
Lots of love,
Mum xxx